Whilst these genuine CV bloopers are hilarious, the fact that they are real is worrying! Please please please read your CV carefully and if possible, ask someone else to proof read it for you. Enjoy our collection… but don’t let yours be next on the list!
“Now I’m fool of energy and ready to deal with new challenge”
“Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to hearing from you shorty”
“Please overlook my qualifications and let me know”
“Instrumental in ruining both the London and Birmingham ranch for over a year”
Education: University of Durham, August 1889 – May 1992
“I have a proven track record and great experience of acurancy and fixing errors”
“My duties included greeting laundrette customers, removing their clothes and washing them”
“I can play well with others”
“I am superior to anyone else you could hire”
“I am a rabid typist.”
“Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year.”
“Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.”
“Reason for leaving last job: They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 am every morning. I couldn’t work under those conditions.”
“My interests include cooking dogs and interesting people”
“While working in this role, I had intercourse with a variety of people”
“I was proud to win the Gregg Typting Award.”
“Develop and recommend an annual operating expense fudget.”
“I am great with the pubic.”
“Seeking a party-time position with potential for advancement.”
“I have worked with restraints for the past two years.”
“I thrive on a challenge and I am a good dommunicator.”
“I’m very kin on this vacancy as I’m receptionist – I think I love this job”
